Solitude

Solitude. A lonely, uninhabited place where the blackness of darkness surrounds, where the silence is deafening. Alone with thoughts, memories.

The avalanches of life hit with a bolt of thunder, a mighty rushing wind! And yet there is a wind of change in every life, for some this takes place in the golden years, yet for many the pain of loss, loneliness, comes in the very early formative stage of life!

hamilton copyPeter, an elderly gentleman enjoyed his ‘long’ walk through the large gypsy community of Huedin to worship in the local Baptist Church – now no longer able to make the journey, he sits alone displaying a quiet contentment. Godliness with contentment is great gain! As my husband and I entered his small yet unique gypsy home a ‘huge’ smile filled his lined, age-torn face ‘Pace, Ah Pace’. We spent time with him listening intently as he spoke of the faithfulness of God and the extraordinary works of God in nature, mountains, cascades, stars, valleys. I found myself sinking lower and lower, feeling so small, so insignificant, so unworthy as this dear saint not only touched but pierced my heart. Time for ????   Five minutes of your time can change an expression; make a difference as you leave the light of His word as a lamp in a darkened corner of a broken, lonely and hurting heart.

We often sing ‘ Change My Heart Oh Lord. . .’ My heart, my life is being changed in so many ways I never anticipated – I am learning so many personal lessons about myself and about the importance of what is important in life from the really important! The Lord knows what needs to be done to-day; all I have to do is surrender, He will direct My responsibility. I’ll say yes Lord yes, to Your will and to Your way. My husband has just asked me: Shirley, is being Missonary only about Evangelism? Pause! Answer?

Two areas of focus this update:

I have been to the work of Preventis, meeting with Violeta on Saturday; then after a very busy Sunday where Dr. Moore ministered on five occasions (4 in the Gypsy community), my husband and I went on Monday to the Maternity Hospital in Cluj while I met with the staff of Preventis. I learned from Tabita Cernica (Director) the 25 disadvantaged children within the drug prevention programme have the opportunity three times each month to spend quality time with their mentor – creating pleasant memories, activities of fun, learning to share together.   £4 oversees each visit, £300 per month covers this expense. I wish to thank Tracey and Travis from Millisle Baptist Church and Linda from Malvern Assembly who are presently engaged in various sponsorships to support these children.

‘Can you tell me the address of heaven?’ One of the questions asked today from a 5 year old at the Emanuel Hospice Art Therapy Class.   The class today was heart rendering, all of the children have very recently lost a Mum or a Dad. I studied those ‘little faces’, beautiful little boys and girls and watched as a Dad or a Grandmother brought the children. Our first game was guessing where I came from. Germany appeared to be the most popular. Then we progressed to stage 1 – painting a picture – cars, flowers, yet one little boy painted a ‘rainbow’. Why? It is in the sky and heaven is in the sky – one little boy said he would like to go up to heaven to bring his Mummy back down again! The afternoon concluded with making Mother’s Day Cards (3 little ones will give their card to their Dad or perhaps their Grandmother)!

I felt so empty inside as I drove home, struggling to accept as to why these little ones suffer so much during the first 5 – 8 years of their young lives? And so I shared with my husband as I entered room 205 ‘secrets of my heart’ as to the ‘Why’s, If Only’s, How’s … of life! No sleep tonight – we shared another and yes another cup of tea but I shared ‘my heart’.

Summation:  At times I am frustrated and feel surrounded with the endless need. It is a fear of personal failure! I want so much to help, to make a difference. The Lord has proved during recent days, He already sees and did provide ahead for the need before I encountered it. THANK YOU for assuring me, I am not alone – I am so aware of your love and care for this work and know that as we serve together we ARE making an impact. One of the Grandmothers as she left whispered ‘You are back, I remember you from Christmas’.   I do not fully understand as to why these little children experience so much sadness in their young lives but YOU are creating a SMILE through your support.

We read in God’s Word ‘I must needs go by . . .’ If the Lord is placing on your heart the desire to assist in the Emanuel Hospice Homecare Team, I can be contacted by email and will be home for a very short time at Easter when we leave to minister in the North East region of Romania before making our way back to Oradea.

THANK YOU to the brothers and sisters who sent love gifts for these families. While Dr Moore is lecturing next week, it will be my joy to distribute your ‘Gift of Love’ on my home visits. Also to Janet, Millisle Sunday School for the project specifically designated for the Art Therapy Class commencing on Sunday, 8th March 2015. We also look forward to setting up ‘Pen Pal’ twining.

‘The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid, do not be discouraged’. Deut 31: 8.

Shirley